Thursday, April 5, 2012

Still in ICU

I had a long day waiting in the ICU with Joel. He would wake up and then not. He would move and then stop... It was a bit frustrating and exhausting to say the least. I know that I need to be patient, but goodness, I do not want to be. 
The other side, appears beautiful, you know the grass is greener on the other side of recovery? hmm I guess I don't know a good visualization for what I am trying to say, other than I want to be two months post op. I want to be on the road to the new normal.
I do not want students pretending to be doctors bugging me. Nor do I want Care Managers offering suggestions of care facilities. GOSH! Seriously. The man wasn't even 10 hours post op. He just had 10 hours of surgery. Ok. That rant is over... or not... 

Home I miss you. I want this surgeon in my hospital. Its comfy chairs, and beautiful casino designed foyers. There are comfy private rooms, and bathrooms not ten millions miles down a VERY LONG hall. I like my comforts close, with flat screen tvs and chairs that are not older than me. I miss having towels and washclothes at my demand, and straws not locked away. Is this too much to ask?

I guess I have too high of expectations at times? ha.

I am in no way disappointed with his care. The RNs are amazing. They save and protect Joel  from students constantly. These nurses have some amazing neuro skills-- Even if the building they work in is old, decrepit and outdated. Our surgical team was outstanding. Our anesthesiologist even personally check in on us this morning. He even had the time to talk to me about how Joel did during surgery. WITH SPECIFICS.  The neurosurgeon last night personally gave me a dictation on how the surgery went, and our oncologist spent time on the phone with me today-- yep I missed her this morning, and she left her personal cell. This woman is so kind. I am looking fwd to meeting her in person. I am so thankful for this opportunity.This will give Joel and I the chance to fight.

Joels tumor is now getting reviewed. They real The rest will go to research here. YAY! lots of good things with this. Who knows, Joel's tumor could end up saving him some day?

Despite a meltdown this evening, based on logical and illogical frustrations, I am thankful. I am sad, because my baby girl will be leaving on an airplane with her mummum papa tomorrow to go home with out me. Sad because I really miss being home. I have been gone this year almost as much as we have been in our home. I really am honestly a home body. Its one thing Joel loves, I have to feel nested where ever we are, hotels, camping ect. I desire that so much that I miss home. Thankful Princess gets to return to school this next week.

So long rant short? I am tired. But please keep praying. Pray for rest. Pray we get out of the ICU in the AM. PRAY AGAINST SEIZURES. 

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